


Cartographer/Orientate

by seraphichan



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Aged-Up Character(s), Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Angst, Angst and Smut, M/M, Multi, Post-Canon
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-04-30
Updated: 2017-04-30
Packaged: 2018-10-25 22:14:48
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 642
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10773540
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/seraphichan/pseuds/seraphichan
Summary: There was something missing, something Eren was still searching for. He couldn’t imagine what it was, and he didn’t know if he would ever find it. But he had Armin. And he had Jean.





	Cartographer/Orientate

**Author's Note:**

> All of the super special thanks to [A26](http://archiveofourown.org/users/A26) and [Arelene0401](http://archiveofourown.org/users/Arlene0401) for helping me find the ending of this thing. I love you, waifus <3

For all the hell they went through, the defeat of the titans came quickly enough. It was...odd. The world as they knew it had effectively come to an end and they were left with nothing but the question

“What now?”

Eren looked at Jean. He didn’t have an answer for him. The walls were gone, taken down bit by bit, titan by titan. Eren was so tired. He wanted to sleep, but at the same time he felt too restless to do it.

“Well,” Armin piped up from between them, “we spent so much time fighting to live. Now we can actually do it.”

But how did they live without fighting?

It seemed that was a question that was unique to Eren.

Armin and Jean found their purpose quickly enough. They set out a few days later with paper and ink and curiosity in tow. Jean drew the world they saw - made maps and diagrams, sketched animals and plants and stars. Armin made notes and observations, wrote paragraph upon paragraph of them, sometimes the words near illegible in his excitement.

Eren went with them, of course, but he couldn’t stop feeling restless. Even after they got to the ocean, even after they sailed across it and found new land to explore. He wondered if he should have stayed behind.

What would he have done there, though? Would he have found something that left him feeling satisfied at the end of each day? Or would he have felt as incomplete as he did here with the two people that made him feel the most whole?

“Shit,” Eren groaned as Jean pushed into him.

“Eren, are you okay?” Armin asked from beneath him, cheeks pink, eyes concerned.

“Yeah,” he sighed. “Why?”

“You’re crying.”

That made Jean stop. “I knew you weren’t ready,” he began. “I told you we should have--”

“Shut up, I’m fine.” Eren wiped at his face with the back of his hand. “Keep going.”

He didn’t.

“Will you just--” Eren pushed back, trying to get Jean to go deeper.

It worked and Jean hissed in pleasure. Armin let out a pleased sound of his own and shuddered when he was thrust inside Eren deeper as well.

“I need this, okay? I need it.”

He could hear the tears in his voice now, could see them as they made his vision fuzzy. He didn’t know why he was crying, but he kept crying the entire time they fucked him; as he hiccuped and gasped with every touch, every word of praise they spoke. He was crying even when they finished, face buried in the crook of Armin’s neck, Jean’s arms wrapping around him from behind.

Eventually he cried himself to sleep.

The next morning was awkward, as was the rest of the day. They wanted to talk to him, Eren knew. He could tell by the way they gave each other quick worried glances, the close yet somehow gaping proximity they kept to him.

“Eren,” Armin ventured later after they had set up camp for the night, “are you sure you’re alright?”

“Yeah.”

“If we fucked something up you have to let us know,” Jean said.

“I would.”

“We aren’t doing anything wrong?” Armin asked. “Or maybe there’s something we aren’t doing at all? Are we missing something?”

“No.”

They weren’t convinced, but Eren didn’t know what he could say to do that. He merely took their hands and gave them, what he hoped was, a reassuring squeeze.

Neither of them hesitated to squeeze back.

“So, what now?” Jean asked.

There was something missing, something Eren was still searching for. He couldn’t imagine what it was, and he didn’t know if he would ever find it. But he had Armin. And he had Jean. And he had an answer this time.

“We live.”

And that was all that mattered for now.


End file.
